Packing, Snoozing.

Friday, July 31, 2009

Finally the boxes are packed and the luggage is ready.
The kids had such a fun time playing with GodMa, GodPa, WK gorgor, and Angela jiejie that nothing could possibly wake them up now.

Photos and possibly videos will be up but for now, sleep tight and sweet dreams.

Mommy Cynthia is still sorting out the documents....
Char jiejie is ... yawning..

See u all tmr =)

Love, Charlene

Off to New York (soon)

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Due to Charmaine's medical condition, the doctor has suggested to fly a day later and tomorrow will be the day. She is now back @ home, as feisty as ever, and all so excited in visiting New York. Clueless is she, on the challenges she will be facing. Cynthia Mommy has been busy packing as she was tied down for two whole afternoon on some private matters. Bitter reality we have seen, but saving your own kid has nothing been more important than it. A strong denial of your own, is shameless. (I digress and pardon for the moment of disgust felt.)

While the two kids were mom-less (and of cos dad-less) for yesterday afternoon, brought them out for a fun in the car. It is interesting to see that, a car is a car for me, but they can spend 2 hrs in the car, roleplaying. Even an unknown "monster" neighbour who parked beside us, joined in the fun for a short while!

They misses their mom so much it is hard to distract them for long.

Want to see how media can train up one's mind? Watch the short clip below. They were singing, this song from a Taiwanese show. Because of charmaine's condition, they are unable to get out of the house so tv remains one of their luxury item.


While Charlene jiejie is also only allowed to bring 10 toys of her own to NY as instructed by the kids, Mommy Cynthia has to keep her to the lightest to accommodate the Mr. Barney, Winnie the Pooh, manymany Doras..

I have also met up with some donors to pass their love notes and gifts to little Charmaine and Mom. Photos are quite dark as I had my phone camera only.


Jase with the piggy bank from Pinky and supporters


Charmaine excited with the Singapore flag pin-up.

Thanks for everyone who made this trip possible, and for helping Cyn mommy in bringing up her odds more than 5times from 10% of survival to 50% chance of survival. We never could have done this without you all!

From the people who care, people who she is related to, to those who gave strength and faith to her to fight on, and even those who ought to but did not help, Mom's a fighter, Char will be a winner in the Monster showdown too!

Next update could be in airport or New York already, so .. take care all!

Love, Charlene

Heading to NUH

Monday, July 27, 2009

11:09
char has high fever now. Rushing into NUH now. 39degrees. Zero immune. Looks like admission for sure ;-(

This must hit a bad time for Mommy Cynthia as she has been busy getting everything ready.
Please pray that Char's circle bone is not being poke by too many needles this round.

Some quick updates during lunchtime:
MSKCC initial deposit of USD350K has been paid up and they are arranging and confirming on the accommodation for Cyn and family. The flight has been confirmed this Thursday and kindly sponsored by a Singapore organization that wished to be un-named. Thank you so much for making it possible for the family to fly together.

MSKCC has also gave us a BIG bomb on the final estimates and these will be updated shortly.

Cyn Mommy conveys her thanks to everyone and the song Angel has been ringing in her head. It meant so much to her.
Our strong feisty mommy has been kept veryvery busy and stressed singlehandedly taking care and making all the arrangements. She hopes all can understand and she will update very soon on the status to thank u all personally.

Thank you so so much.

Love, Charlene

~~~~~~~~~
Updated 30th July 2009 0017

Hi all,

Sorry for the lack of updates... Everyone's been preoccupied.

Thanx for all your concern.

Charmaine was discharged from NUH on Tuesday night.

She was sooooooo CUTE just now... very feisty indeed. She and Jase were playing happily with each other and did many cute things just now.

She did lots of cheeky sniggering and laughter whenever she knew she was doing something wrong. Simply put us in stitches. =D

Love,
Jolene

Ourfeistyprincess Santa Party

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Special thanks to Sheau Wen and gang, Haicinda cafe and staff, the magicians and all who attended especially Dora
The kids had so much fun even after crying after seeing the mascot.
Some questions that were thrown to me and I had no idea how to response:
Why Dora mouth cannot close?
Why is Dora tongue pink?
Why Boots never come down to walk?
Why Dora come out from jungle?
Why Map did not come out?
Where is "dao dan gui"?
How come Dora so big?
I guess, it still takes abit more time before they can understand.

It is such a coincidence that, we have been playing "magic fingers" and the magicians also have their own magic fingers trick that the kids could relate to. =)

Oh ya! We hope that the swinging chairs did not break after all the abusive actions and the poor little squirrel did come back to the tree after the loud good-byes by the kiddos.

Charmaine and friends surely enjoyed themselves and again, thanks to all who had been there and part of the enjoyment they had.
They have been waiting for this party for the entire week, calling it, the Santa Party.

We were too busy to snap any photos, so for those who did, feel free to reach us @ our gmail so that we can document all these down.

Love, Charlene

P/s: Safe travels to Charmaine's "future father-in-law". lol.

100% behind u

Friday, July 24, 2009

Thank you Nuffnang!

A fundraising campaign has been launched for Charmaine by Nuffnang.

Here is the microsite:
http://www.nuffnang.com.sg/forcharmaine/index.php



An extract from the site:

"Our little Nuffnanger Charmaine was diagnosed with 4th stage neuroblastoma on 13th February 2009. She has 10 to 20% chance of living if she seeks local treatment. She has 40 to 50% chance of living if she seeks treatment in New York.

As of 5th July, Ourfeistyprincess team has managed to raise $500,000 SGD and they are preparing to send Charmaine to New York for the treatment.

Nuffnang is truly inspired by little Charmaine’s fighting spirit. Thus, Nuffnang have decided to join in and do our part as well. Nuffnang would like to invite all our fellow Nuffnangers to join us in providing our little feisty princess with the love and support she needs.

With 40,000 Nuffnangers in Singapore, we believe that together we can aid Chamaine in her fight and make a difference.

This fundraising campaign would run for a period of two months from 23rd July to 24th September 2009.

We would also like to highlight that this is a nonprofit campaign and every dollar donated will be given directly to Charmaine’s family."



Thank you Ming, Elaine and the whole nuffnang team for helping Charmaine to fight this battle.

Love,
Jolene

Thank you, AXN and SPE NETWORKS - ASIA

Thursday, July 23, 2009



Love, Charlene

The colours i like

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

"I like pink, red and white"
" U know why I like red and white?"
"because when you do painting, u use red and white, together it becomes pink!"
- By Charmaine

Love, Charlene

Saving Charmaine Concert 2009

Monday, July 20, 2009





Love, Charlene

More videos uploaded

Friday, July 17, 2009

These videos were taken before Charmaine's surgery (18th June). You can click on them to read the descriptions on the right.

Pretend play -- caterpillar


Charmaine in full concentration dancing the fan dance


Pretend play -- Burying the shark


Pretend play -- Shooting


Enjoying herself on kiddy ride before her surgery


Running freely on the night before her surgery... Love her cute smile


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Clearing emails on my hotmail from 3 pages back (beginning July). Please bear with me if I've yet to get back to you.

Love,
Jolene

A photo story: Charmaine's 4th birthday celebration

Thursday, July 16, 2009

14th July 2009... a happy occasion for Charmaine and cyn mummy.

For Charmaine, her happiness is of pure innocence. For cyn mummy, her happiness is of eternal gratitude.

~*~

Numerous gifts not just for Charmaine but for Jase as well... really thoughtful of all the donors and guests.



Middle top:
The cute little boy up there is Char's boyfriend. Hehe... She often tells us about him and now we finally saw him in real life.

Middle bottom:
When we saw the T-shirts, we just went "WAHHHH! So cute!!!" Jase has one too which he wore immediately.


What is a party without some dancing? Charmaine sure knows how to party!




A barbie cake...





similar to that from last year.



This was what happened to Barbie when Charmaine insisted on sticking the candles into the cake by herself.




Char was allowed to eat anything she wanted that day. She ate lots of cake. She loved the cream part best.




After eating some cake, little princess started her dance again.



The kids had a whale of a time... The Dora tent was enough to entertain them for hours. Charmaine was so happy to be mingling with her good friends -- something which she has not been able to do for months.






However,



Thanx to all the kind uncles, aunties, kor kors and jie jies who donated the gifts and also for making their way down to celebrate Charmaine's birthday and for making the occasion such a joyous one.

More video clips to look out for. I'm still in the midst of uploading them.

Love,
Jolene

Fund Raising Activities

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

With the completion of many fund raising activities, we would like to give our heartfelt thanks to the organizers and you all who had participated in it.

The last few days have been busy meeting up with the organizers, and I hope I did not miss out any (if i do, please email me)

1. dphotofolio
The photos done up is very sweet! Thanks for putting it all together for us! We have seen all the well-wishes for Charmaine and glad that they have enjoyed it. =)

2. Otah Boy
Thanks to the kind hearted souls from Motherhood forum and to the organizer. No one will know the extend of help that a small box of otah can bring to us. Coincidentally, the kids used to eat otah too! =) Thanks for the list of donors provided.

3. TupperWare sales
Hope it has been a great success for u all as it has been for us.

4. Doggie Photoshoot
What an encore event it is! Thanks for the dog lovers and photographers who put in much effort in getting this done up.

5. Disney Cushies
It must have been my favourite characters too!

Thanks everyone for giving our Princess the ray of light, hope, and faith that was once dimmering in her life. Yesterday was her birthday and boy, is our girl havin gmuch fun even up till today. Ask her who has turned 4? And she will say, ME! and I am taller and bigger now like Jase Jase.

For donors who have bought her presents in hand-made hair accessories, colouring books, puzzles, dolls, stickers, many forms of Doras that we never have imagined (Dora Tent, Bowl, Pen, Passport Holder, Cardholder, Towel), for her big bro Jase, and of course the three Feisty Family white tees... The kids had a great time tearing the presents up, while we had a long time clearing up...

Yesterday before her party, she went for her regular check in NUH, and had transfusion there and then, before coming back. Her feisty spirit was clearly shown, as the blood that flowed, was not shown on her face.

Photos will be up shortly...

Love, Charlene

A birthday with a whole new meaning... for my feisty little princess... Happy Birthday Charmaine.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Today 4 years ago was the day I was pushed into delivery ward alone.
But I came out together with my feisty little princess, Charmaine.

Today, 4 years since 14 July 2005, Charmaine just woke up happily asking, "is it my birthday today? Am I 4 years old now?"

I couldnt help but tear. It a joyous occasion. Its a happy day. I shouldnt shed a single tear but I just couldnt control myself. "Yes, its princess's birthday today and you are 4! Time to brush your teeth!"

Every 14 July from this year onwards takes a whole new meaning for me.
Its not just a birthday celebration.
Its a celebration of life, celebration of family, celebration of love.

That my feisty little princess is still here with me, jumping with joy and informing everyone its her birthday today...
That I still have my family with me on this day...
That I still can see and witness the love of my two not-so-tiny babies...

I count my blessings... I am happy even though I am crying.
Birthdays have never been so special, so meaningful and so treasured like today.

I am thankful that I am celebrating today with my feisty princess, with some of her best friends, godma and new big friends.
In fact, I am thankful for everyday with Jase and Char.
But today stands out a little more from the rest because today Char is 4.

Age used to be just a number, a number I prepare myself for a certain phase in my or their lives... 5 means kids will be in Kintergarten 1, which means its time to volunteer for Primary 1 when they turn 7... I am going to 30s, will no longer be in my twenties.

Strangely, age is not just a number anymore. Not a phase in their growing up years that I track in order to keep up with the norms... In some ways, there's no 'norms' in the unusual life of my princess Char. She's blessed with so many aunties, uncles, kor kors and jie jies' love, and that is special and priceless. THANK YOU.

This day belongs to you too. Because you made it possible.

I am learning to take one step at a time and was taught to not look too far ahead into the future of unknowns... Charmaine said it best when it comes to taking it one step at a time...

Charmaine asked me, "What is wish mommy?"
I replied, "Its what you want."
Charmaine than answered loudly, "I want to go concert, sing and dance. I want to go to school. I want to be 5 years old like Jase. I want to be tall like Kor Kor."

Given a choice, my wish for Charmaine would be for her to grow up healthy, with a doting husband, a family of lovely kids and be a happy old granny...

But I know I should take one step at a time...
Hence my wish for Charmaine would be...
[PS: Sorry. I deleted what I wrote because I strongly believe that I am a jinx when it comes to wishing out aloud. And I will not take any chances with this wish.]

I will try to be the happiest mom I can be today. I should.

May everyone be blessed with good health.

Love,
Cyn mommy

---
Edit to update:

Here I am , in our feistyprincess home where she and her korkor are snoring away =)
This afternoon, Jase said: You must come today ar.. for Charmaine birthday...
Bet they have been waiting for this!

I sang birthday song in english and princess demanded for a chinese version too. You can hear her chuckles.

Thanks to donors from Motherhood forum, Auntie Renee, Uncle Ben and Little Jazzel!
Here's the heavyweight presents and cake!







Love, Charlene

Blessing abundance

Sunday, July 12, 2009

The kids had fun parading in front of their gugu, gonggong, with the new found loves - Clothes!
Kingkow had kindly provided us some vouchers to choose the clothes for the kids, and both of them are loving their clothes tremendously! It has been a long time since Cynthia has bought them new clothes given her hectic schedule and I am sure the kids welcome this change.

If not for the TV, the photo below would have been much better!

Check out her Yellow hairband that we thought it was a nice change in her usual pink.
The boy had a baby blue jacket/vest, over the white polo. Jase is eating more now, but still as skinny! Luckily the sales girl from Kingkow recommended this pair of jeans, that has a secret adjustment at the back. Char jiejie is suku when it comes to this. =X

Jase is too engrossed with whatever is showing on the tv, but babes are always babes. Turn on the camera and they will look and smile =D

Their latest toys will be strips of paper coloured with squares and had Ben 10 stickers on them. Each represent a super power. When pressed, selected powers will be activated. Only special ones are given the power strap to fight the monster. A prototype is worn by the Princess. LOL.

As sweet as our Princess, the kids heart the card below:


Thanks to those who had made this card.

Love, Char

Donation Tag

Saturday, July 11, 2009

I am done till 25th Jan.
For those who has donated by this date and not yet received their confirmation, please email me.
Esp so for the groups under CASH or Quick Cheque deposit.

Thanks!
Charlene

FundRaising Activities

Friday, July 10, 2009

1. FeistyPrincessGifts

With the efforts by the Gift Association and Universal Venture, they have printed and will be selling the following items on http://feistyprincessgifts.blogspot.com/

A preview of their item:

1) T-shirts crew neck adult sizes $20 each (available from XXS-XXL)
2) T-shirts crew neck kid sizes $10 each (available from size 28-34)
3) Pens (assorted) $2 each
4) Keychain $5 each
...

This Blog is set up just to sell little Charmaine merchandise to raise funds for her medical treatment. All items are sponsored by the corporate gifts and premiums companies and 100% of the proceeds will all go to her.

2. Flea Market - www.sgcarbootsale.com
There will be a flea market on 18th to 19th July and the organizer has kindly asked if any of the interested parties would like to have a space to sell the items for Charmaine. With this, if you are keen in having a space (i think is around ECP area like the carbootsale), please email me with your Name/Email/ContactNumber/Items to sell and I will provide the contacts to the organization.

Updates:
Register at http://www.sgcarbootsale.com/contact.html and in the field/question: How did you find out about us, please get them to enter (In support of Charmaine).

Thank you again!!!!!

----

Some conversations with the kids:

Charlene: Come kids, let's choose the photos for your passport
Jase: Mommy this one is nicer. Her eyes open
Charmaine: Yeap, can see her teeth also. Hair also very nice.
Charlene: What about Charlene jiejie?
Both: Not pretty. Mommy prettiest.
(Cyn, u must check their eyes la)

Then, when they are choosing for themselves,
Jase: This one for Charmaine. Cos the light brighter, and can see her eyes.
( Note that Jase always cares about the eyes. LOL)
Charmaine has no comments as anything her korkor chooses, she will just agree!


Charmaine: This one korkor handsome. Just now that one can see nose too big, .......
(And she blabber a whole lot of not nice points of the previous to derive to the photo below)



SO yeap, the kids are on the way to have their passport soon!!!

Talking to the kids are so much fun. Reminds me of the recent Mother's Day and Father's Day.
Jase came back and wrote on a card: Mommy, I am nuts about you! and had a peanut shell stuck on the card. I thought it was pretty cool!
What came next was Father's day. Jase had a hard time thinking who to give his card to. Pass to mommy? Nope. He said father is a boy. Mommy is a girl, cannot. Pass to Cyn brother? Nope. He said, Gu gu is gu gu not father. And he was so cute walking around the house and decided to pass to GongGong, Cyn father, instead. Such a sweet boy and you really dont know what u have missed!

Char has been lazy on the updates with photos, but I guess I will have to buck up onthis =X

---

Before I end off this long post,

Congrats Jolene for her BIG Day today!!!!

Poor girl has been suffered on the preparations...
Heck everything and just enjoy babe!!!!
The kids will be waiting for you and I will remind them of your new status!
Enjoy your these two days, before.. the load is passed to u. hehe.
Muackz and Hugz!!

Love, Charlene

Thank you Media

Thursday, July 9, 2009



To the readers of WanBao, listeners of Radio100.3 and others who have come forth to us, thank you so much in donating to Charmaine and Cynthia. This huge financial burden on Cynthia especially, carrying the workload of being both a mother, a father, a caregiver, and a playmate to the kids, has been lighten with everyone of you. You had helped us to concentrate more on the wellbeings of the kids, and went beyond the normal call of help. We might be strangers on the roads, but please stop by if you happen to see our Princess Charmaine, and her superb korkor, to give them the encouragement to walk on =)

We never would have come so far, without the media.
Thank you to the radio-ers, the reporters, and of course, to you who believed in us, and give us the faith.

Guitar sold!

Thanks to the seller and buyer!!!

---
Many have emailed to ask about the trip:

1. When will it be?
Targeting end July or early August depending on Charmaine health status. Last round that she has the same drug, she needs to be back in the hospital quite often. In addition, we just received an email from MSKCC that the amount needs to be remitted first before anything can be started. So the timeline will also be hinged on it.

2. Where will she be?
MSKCC location can be googled, but it willbe in NYC, NY.

3. Do we have accommodation?
Yes. MSKCC will try to refer us to social worker where they most likely will put them in Ronald MacDonald house. It is a place to hold parents like Cynthia. It is not next to the hospital but within blocks. Commute through cab will be expected because weather might turn too bitter for the kids to walk, and Cynthia is alone there. Before anyone starts to cry out loud and ask why are donations turned into luxury (cabs), offer better alternative first. She is, only, a single woman. Not superwoman.

4. Can you pass presents to Charmaine and the family?
Yes you can however, because she will be in NY, toys etc might not be played for long.

5. How do we get in touch with Cynthia in NY if we would like to help?
I am arranging local number for her, and will be posting up the location once she is there. You can contact her through there, or email to the team back in Singapore.

We are still not very sure what kinda help we would most need, but I guess at this point, we are settling the obvious one:
- Immigration (passport, visa)
- Transport (airtickets, internal transfer)
- Clothes (winter clothes)

For those who have left their contacts thru the email, dont worry as they are still kept in with us. =)

OK! Head back to work, and thanks all for helping again!!!

Love, Charlene

Princess Char Art and Craft

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

This is me!

The 5th chemo has been a toll on her, as well as her family. With the blessings of angels, Charmaine did not react as bad as the previous round, however, daily nausea still comes about. The tiredness engulfed our Princess too. She wakes up at 9am and fall aslp again at 11am. But we are glad that at least she sleeps =)

Here's 1 for all!


Love, Charlene

Pardon me, ourfeistyprincess supporters

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

I hope it's not presumptuous of me to make use of this blog to post a short note. I figured this is the best way to reach out to all.

I won't be able to reply to mails sent to my personal hotmail a/c till the end of this week as I'll be tying up all the loose ends before my wedding on Friday. Getting a wee bit stress as things haven't been going very smoothly for us due to the H1N1. Plus, I need to get more sleep coz friends around me have been telling me that I look terrible. It helps when I have jie meis who encourage me to sleep by saying they dun wanna outshine me on my big day. What a bunch of jie meis really!

Sorry to digress... I'm typing this with half my eyes closed.

I've yet to reply to the many emails sent today too. I will only reply to follow up email corrspondence and those which require immediate attention. Hope to seek your understanding on this.

For prompt response, direct your mails to ourfeistyprincess@gmail.com. Charlene will respond to you. Sorry ah Charlene, add more load over your side. =P

Thank you all for your support and in believing in Charmaine.

Take care all of you.

Love,
Jolene

Fundraising -- Hello Kitty Mooncakes, UGG boots, Doggies Fun

Monday, July 6, 2009

Mooncakes with a twist

Mid Autumn Festival is fast approaching. If you like mooncakes with a twist, you can consider ordering Hello Kitty mooncakes from one of our readers in support for Charmaine.





Here is an extract taken from the word doc they've sent us:

"Let us help her. We are making Hello Kitty mooncakes and 100% of all sales proceeds will be donated towards Charmaine’s medical fund. Each box at SGD$25 consists of 4 different flavours of Hello Kitty Snow Skin Mooncakes, namely, chocolate, pandan, strawberry and plain. All are filled with home made lotus paste and red bean paste. Collection will be from 27 July 2009 onwards. We will try to accommodate all requests, please let us know in advance."

Please contact: Hwee @ 96328234 for orders and collection.

Made with love by Pink’s Creations –
http://www.myhumblearts.blogspot.com/

http://www.hellokitty4charity.blogspot.com/

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

UGG Boots

UGG boots are comfortable and fashionable.

One of our readers have created a gift card for ourfeistyprincess readers which gives them $30 to spend at their store.

Here is an extract taken from the email:

"All your readers need to do is visit our website http://www.whoogaboots.co.uk/ and enter the code OURFEISTYP into the cart. We ship to all countries and there are no conditions."


ugg boots

Love,
Jolene
----

Edited to add:
Fight The Monster Fund Raising-- Fun Jumpers Workshop & Fun Games
Venue: Bishan Park Dog Run (small field)
Date: Sat 11th July
Time: 7 - 8pm
Fees: $50 per dog & owner
Additional dog @ $10 each
Activities:
1) Fun Games eg: Doggie Race, Hurdle Race, Best Costume ( Prizes to be won )
2) Fun Jumpers Workshop

Do register with your name, contact number & full payment. As this is for Charity, there will be no refund. Do register by 10th July Fri.

Email your registration & enquiries to: charitydogsports@yahoo.com.sg

-----

Feisty Princess Fund Raising @ HEART Market


Venue: Sculpture Square

Date: 11 &12 July 2009 ( Sat & Sun)

Time: 10-7pm

Fees: Free Admission

Activities: There will be a booth specially set up for Feisty Princess Fund Raising.

* Mr Casey Chen had donated out 100 lovely badges @ only $2.00 each and 100% of the income goes to the fund.

* Dolly Deer had made more pretty accessories for you to bring home! 100% of the income goes to the fund too.

* Hot items from Dolly Deer, Button Earstud for only $3.90, every earstud sold, $1.00 goes to the fund. Don't miss out the good deals! you might not get good stuffs and great price after this!!

* 'Love Bank' will place at the booth, you can drop the feisty team a note over there! Cute papers will be provided.

* Live band to entertain you over there!

Email your enquiries to: littledollydeer@gmail.com



THANK YOU ANGELS, We raised half a million for Charmaine!

Sunday, July 5, 2009

I received a message from Jolene yesterday morning, ‘We have raised that half a million and we can start preparing to send Charmaine over!’

Thank you for giving us a chance at living…
I am very touched.
I want to say a heartfelt THANK YOU to each one of you who have made it possible for my feisty little one.

THANK YOU for your kindness, thank you for your help, thank you for your time and effort, thank you for the fundraisers, thank you for the encouragement and thank you for walking this journey with me.

This additional 20% - 40% chance of survival would never have been possible for Charmaine, without you.
You have given not only my Charmaine a chance at living…
You have provided a chance for Jase to continue to play and fight with his mei mei…
You have also given me a chance to be with the 2 kids that I so love and need…
Most importantly, YOU have granted my family a chance to be the family that we have always been…

THANK YOU.

The Journey in New York…
I have been asked if I am mentally prepared for what I may expect in New York, especially since I am going to be facing a lot of things by myself, without the support of family and friends. My answer is “No, I am not”. I freaked out when I went on my first business trip and ended up cooping myself in the hotel for fear of getting myself lost. I am terrible at my sense of direction. I am not sure how I am going to be taking care of the 2 kids and whether I would crumble under all the stress… I am very afraid…

“Will I be able to take the news if things don’t turn out the way I wish it would be?” NOPE. I will not. I won’t lie to you and say that I am prepared for what come may and I would be able to take things in my own stride because I simply am not. I have never been prepared for such a huge challenge thrown into my life and they just come crushing down one after another… Whether I am prepared or not, things still happen… And whether I am prepared or not, I still have to do what I have to do…

I am feeling scared, overwhelmed and helpless…

I will probably cry a million times when we are there. Getting around, comforting the kids, taking care of Charmaine, making all the decisions for the treatments, cooking, grocery shopping, cleaning, bills, finances, etc… However, I still have to do what I have to do.

I cannot stop moving ahead because I cant… Charmaine’s life is dependent on my decisions and time is not on my side either…

On the decision to bring Jase…
One of the major decisions I had to make was whether I should leave Jase behind. I have always been thinking about this since day one of my decision to plead publicly. I understand its better to leave Jase behind because I can than focus my attention on Charmaine and not have to worry about Jase.

When Charmaine was recovering from her surgery in KKH, neither the physiotherapist nor myself could get Charmaine to try and take a few steps. We were discharged from KKH with me worrying over how I was going to try and get Charmaine to practice walking despite the pain. The first time when she did her tumor biopsy and surgery to implant the port-a-cath into her body, she took quite some time to overcome the pain and start walking. Hence, with this major surgery, I was even more paranoid and worried. What happened next when we reached home from KKH just got me speechless. Upon reaching home, while still seated in her stroller, Jase walked up to Charmaine and held her hand and than before I know it, the 2 of them were already walking hand in hand back into the room. No support from mommy. Of course I was still very concerned that she might fall as she had not walked for 7 days and I wasn’t sure if I could trust her leg muscles to support her body weight. But Charmaine seemed to have forgotten her fears and forgotten that she hadn’t walked in days and all the pain and just walked as normally as a healthy kid. I was in tears and I knew that I had to bring Jase along. Everyday while in NUH receiving her chemo, one of the things Charmaine looks forward to is her Kor Kor’s daily visits at night. Her smile and her eyes glowed with such happiness that it would be too cruel of me to deprive her of if I left Jase behind. I know it would be tougher with 2 kids in toll but once again, I prefer to look at the help that Jase would provide me with. As much as I try to hold my spirits up high and play with Charmaine, there is always a tinge of sadness behind my laughter and I no longer could play like how we used to play together. The kids are different. They do not share my worries and fears and they play and fight just like the way that they have been doing for years… I need Jase to keep the spirits up for Charmaine…

Most importantly, if anything should happen... I cant bear the thought of Jase being apart from his mei mei and I need Jase with me too...

Other Updates…
I still have other updates on how the discussion with Dr Aung turned out on Tuesday. In short, the decision is still to send Charmaine over as soon as she recovers from this chemo as any delay would give the cancer cells in her bone marrow to spread…

I am going to be busy taking care of Charmaine for the next week, while also trying to sort out the logistics for New York… Please kindly bear with me and the rest of the feisty team if we are slow with updates…

As expected, this is the combination of chemo drugs that will cause her to be in quite a fair bit of discomfort. Since our discharge yesterday afternoon, Charmaine has been vomiting a handful of times at home… Basically, everything she ate, she vomited… She is still hungry but the body doesn’t allow her to keep the food… She has also been complaining of a tummy pain which I suspect is nausea as she doesn’t know how to differentiate… Spirits wise, our little feisty princess is still doing her best to stay the way she is… despite the nausea, despite the tummy pain…

Please allow me to keep this a short one as I need to get moving again.

I want to say a THANK YOU to all the angels… THANK YOU!

May every one of you be blessed with good health and happiness…

Love,
Cyn mommy

Thanksgiving Day

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Thanks to our Angels who gave their time, efforts and $ to Cyn and Feisty princess.

1) The Fox Cap and "Somerset" Girl


2) Starduz Hardwarezone EDMW team
- To ur 1-1 $10K match donor, to the rest of the $20+K donors contributing to this, yes we have received all your bullets to fight with the monster


3) SSOG who raised more than $2,000+

There are more coming in and we cant thank enough.

Love, Charlene

Updates after 5th Chemo

Princess is back at home but as expected, this chemo wil make her feel very sick and will keep vomit because of the drug used.

19:18:
She just vomitted. As expected, this is the tough one. She was nausea all along, didnt know how to say, kept saying is tummy ache.

22:26
Jus vomitted all over again

Love, Char

Administration: Tagging of Donors

Friday, July 3, 2009

Aiyah! Blogspot hates me =( I have problem (still) with the posting of the blog.

Nowadays, Charmaine has many secrets to tell everyone whenever you call her. Everything is a secret to her. "Charlene jiejie, tell you a secret.... "

Cyn mummy has slowly told her the idea of having treatment in US. However, she said that she wants to be back @ home.

But, is getting better today. And all she has in mind now is, playing snow and putting Charlene jiejie in a box, tie her up and transport her there. Afterwhich, Charlene jiejie would have to lug all the luggages and be left behind.

Cheeky girl =)

Back to the topic, I am now done tagging up to 22nd June so for those whom I did not reply, it means, you cant be traced either with the nick that you provide or thru CASH or Cheque. Drop me an email so that I can match based on the amount you donated.

I am halfway through 23rd June.

Have a great weekend everyone!!
Lotsa fund raising activities coming up!

Love, Charlene

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Edited to add:

To those who emailed me at my hotmail a/c,
Apologies for the delay in replies. I've managed to clear most mails except for receipt confirmation to donors whom I'm not able to track via the printscreen.

DBS iBanking service is currently not available as they are conducting maintenance work on their system. Silly me didn't see a link to click for information on the expected uptime and so happily waited till now (4.46am). It was only a moment ago that I saw the link to click and realised that it's undergoing maintenance from 0000hrs - 1100hrs on 4th July.

So Sorry for the delay. I'll get back you asap.

Thanx to all the angels and warriors for your love and support!

Love,
Jolene

NUH 5th Round Chemo

Thursday, July 2, 2009

With technological advances, here's something for all. =)

Sorry that I cant upload it, so had to use a viewer in this case.

Top Left: " I dont want to kiss you" - She refuses to kiss me in the morning
Top Right: " You cant see me!" - She is playing for the first time, with the girl beside her bed.
Bottom Left: "Happy Birthday to you" - They were so cute! They sang in English, then in Mandarin, and finishes the last verse in English again! So sweet
Bottom Right: "She did it this afternoon" by Cyn



Love, Charlene

FundRaising Activities

1) Fun Jumpers Workshop
1 hrs Fun Jumpers Workshop
Venue: Bishan Park Dog Run (small field)
Date: Sat 4th July
Time: 7 - 8pm
Fees: $50 per dog & owner
Additional dog @ $10 each
Do register with full payment.
As this is for Charity, there will be no refund.
Do register by 4th July Sat 1pm. Do forward to your friends who might be interested. Thanks.
Email your registration & enquiries to: charitydogsports@yahoo.com.sg


2) Radio 100.3FM Drive
Fri 3rd July 1230pm @ newton circus , and 6pm bedok stadium
Goodies bag and donation box has been set up

Thanks to sponsors:
- Wen Ken group
- Hoyu Beauteen cosmake colour
- UIC
- Chrispy Chocolate
- 1824 Clipper tea
- Kirei Kirei Hand Wash
- Systema Toothpaste
- Rober Timms Coffee
- Yamie Rice

All fund raising activities are also listed at the right hand panel of this blog.

----
I cant put up photos today. Probably blogspot wants a birthday break from me too =X Will put up our cheeky girl photos later.

Thanks all!

Love, Charlene

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHARLENE JIE JIE!

Charmaine, Jase and Cyn mommy wants to say a BIG HAPPY BIRTHDAY HERE to Charlene JIE JIE!!! We wish you abundance happiness, good health and great wealth forever!!! And we love you! THANK YOU for making this possible for us. THANK YOU ANGEL!

Love,
Cyn mommy and Char and Jase

In NUH for 5th Chemo

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Dear all,

Charmaine is doing her 5th chemo now.

For direct contacts of Cynthia, please do not visit Charmaine if you are unwell as this round of chemo drugs would affect her quite badly.

For the numerous strangers who have dropped us notes and mails with the intention to visit Charmaine, we're sorry to say that we have to limit visitors to only cyn's family and close friends.

Hope to seek your understanding on this.

We mentioned previously that Charmaine has a window period of somewhere between end July to August to receive the drugs in MSKCC. Dr Aung has suggested to send her there after her 5th Chemo.

We have hit an astounding maximum of 2000+ new emails this morning. Charlene has managed to clear most of them a while ago. I could almost feel her heart attack. I've yet to clear those on my hotmail so for those of you who emailed me there, I'm so sorry I need more time to clear.

As mentioned by Charlene in another post, please check the blog very carefully for information you are looking for before emailing us. It would ease our load greatly.

Questions on neuroblastoma treatments, why NY and not Singapore, why only this particular treatment for Charmaine etc have already been answered on the blog. Believe us, if there are other alternatives to increase Charmaine's survival rate without having to to to NY, Cynthia would definitely have done so.

Please always check the blog for updates. Whenever possible, we would definitely update here.

Lastly, thanx to all our human angels for joining Charmaine in her battle. All of you are warriors too! =)

Love,
Jolene
 
Feisty Princess Charmaine. Design by Pocket